I was up very early (because I did all my sleeping the day before… ah, jet lag…) so I got everything done that I needed to for the day trip to Nagoya, and even started to re-pack my suitcase for the return trip to Canada.
Not that I’m in any way eager to go back.
After having arrived at the first two lives just in the nick of time, I learned my lesson and bought my Shinkansen tickets well in advance for the last two, just in case a lot of others ended up travelling during the same time slots as me.
The train was southbound from Tokyo this time, so the scenery I got to see along the way was quite different from what I’d seen on the prior northbound routes.
Most notably, I got to see 富士山!
I kind of just stared in awe and disbelief. I’ve travelled down to Nagoya and Osaka before, but for whatever reason (maybe I was sitting on the wrong side of the train), I’d never spotted Mount Fuji before. The only other time I’d spotted the legendary mountain was on a hill in a residential neighbourhood outside Yokohama, squinting at the peak far in the distance. The sight of Mount Fuji during the trip to Nagoya definitely set an awesome tone for the live I was about to attend.
And it turns out it was a very good thing that I set out extra early this time, because I got pretty lost in Nagoya station (accidentally entering through a local train fare gate instead of the subway station gate I had been trying to find). Still, I made it to the venue with plenty of time to spare, for once there early enough to line up in order and go into the livehouse in sequence according to the number printed on my ticket. That is something that’s quite interesting about the standing-room-only livehouse experience in Japan, because over here, everyone just needs to line up (or camp out lol) outside the venue and it’s first-come first-served once the doors open.
I was so excited to get into the venue, that I forgot to switch from my warm, Groovy Chiko hoodie to stained glass robe when I was tossing my purse into a coin locker… the robe would have been lighter to dance in, but no harm done.
I really liked the layout and feel of tonight’s venue, and something about the acoustics made their sound seem extra powerful (or maybe that was just me being really excited). Overhead there was a cool, contemporary-style chandelier as well as a disco ball, while off to the right the bar was tucked away in an alcove where anyone could leave to get a drink if they felt like it.
Each night’s live has had wilder energy than the last.
Absolutely breathtaking.
After we had clapped them on during the SE, the curtains were lit a murky blue or green from behind and then raised dramatically, as ALICE NINE. began playing Living Dead. That was extremely cool. Next came Answer followed by WHITE PRAYER to get everyone in the room hyped up (I will never get tired of the live arrangement of that one) and from there they dove into the badassery that is the song RUMWOLF, to which I thought, hell yeah!
Because I had so much space to move around in this venue (I had decided to stand further back again, but still had an excellent view of Saga playing), this time I got into dancing the Moondance with even more wild abandon than before. To keep the decadence and debauchery going, they played 造花の代償 next, and the bass line was so cool… instead of each member throwing flowers (like I’d seen them do for ALICE IN CASTLE in 2018), it was just Show teasing the crowd with the fake flower while Saga kept the bassline going, everyone else’s instruments building the scene around it.
While everyone else did 振り付け (choreographed dances), I stayed still during the お経 in 界, palms clasped together beneath my chin, head tilting in the overpowering light to watch Saga’s shadowed figure mesmerize us from the stage.
Welcome to the temple of ALICE NINE.
Feel the might of their music, their sound, their tone, their performance.
With a quick switch from bass to acoustic guitar, Envy then began, and I’m not sure if he did it in previous lives (he probably did), but Saga’s rapping on the acoustic guitar with his ring sounded extra loud and sharp tonight. It was another beautiful rendition of the song with Shou singing in lower tones, the rest of the instruments building slowly, steadily, powerfully until the end of the song.
I truly didn’t expect 十六夜 to be played for whatever reason, and so it was such a surprise — a wonderful one at that. It was beautiful and powerful live. While the tender complexity of the song wafted and dissipated in the air, piano song began playing on the speakers in the dim lighting, and all the members except for Nao left the stage.
Thus began the Drum Solo, with Nao leading us both from the front podium and from behind his drum set in the beats he’d be performing for us that evening. Once again we all clapped and called out in time and unison, more than eager to keep the energy up and carry it through the rest of the live. With that, the other four members returned to the stage, took up their positions, and began playing Roar. On the tail-end of that powerhouse of a performance, they began Heart of Gold, everyone jumping and dancing in the stage lights while the members filled the room with the upbeat sound of that classic.
RAINBOWS came next, and it is SO much fun each time, it really is. We A-jumped, we cheered on all the solos, members ran around the stage, Saga took the front podium briefly to make sure we were all jumping and having fun (as we should be) and then Show gave the song a proper close with a high note!
Funeral‘s cool complexity melting into Exodus: was awesome. After which, they didn’t let us lose steam, and so started playing 開戦前夜. Because there was a bit of extra elbow room in the back where I was, a group of four 九組 next to me actually started dancing and moshing in a circle together at certain points in the song, and I almost wanted to join in (I never would have actually forced myself into their friend group though lol). It was so obvious, that even Saga took notice, looking over and grinning at their enthusiasm.
Lives are slowly starting to regain their footing 🙂
When the song ended, I felt elated, trying to catch my breath, and they then began to play Farewell Flowers. Each time I’ve heard this at a live, it’s become more soothing, like sitting in a canoe or a kayak on a calm lake at sundown, feeling the wind and the water gently rock you.
Shortly after they put down their instruments, waved, and left the stage, we collectively took up the call for an Encore, clapping and calling them back to the stage. We cheered when the lights went up again, and they returned, regaling us with a performance of the breezy, breath of fresh air that is 透明の翼. Next up was ブループラネット, and the song had such huge, playful energy tonight.
Finally, last but in no way least, Grace was soulful and exquisite.
I was so sleepy, so satisfied, I nearly fell asleep on the shinkansen back to Tokyo… and then it was a mad dash once I did get back to the station to make sure I caught the subway back to where I was staying before the trains stopped for the night. Thankfully, by that point I knew my way around the station quite well by memory.
I had a good soak in the bath before bed, and then finally drifted off to sleep, replaying all the best moments of the live over in my mind… ♡♪
I spent most of the day sleeping… it was rainy outside, but so warm in bed…
Finally, I put on something fairly warm to go out in the rain with, and headed for this very particular venue. A huge milestone of accomplishment for bands in Japan, Budoukan is a large circular arena, impressive both from the outside and on the inside.
People arriving from the subway station, me among them, shuffled forward in the rain, taking out their umbrellas, and forming a line to walk through enormous doors of stone, wood, and wrought iron.
I’ve seen footage of several bands making their debut performance there (like ALICE NINE., NIGHTMARE, and the GazettE), but this was the first time I’d been able to go to the venue personally.
Even from all the way up in the second-last row of attendees, where I was, the view and the power of lynch.’s performance was awesome.
Despite having been a fan from years back, I didn’t end up knowing many of the songs included in their setlist that night (which was cool all the same). The first song by them that I heard was a grateful shit, followed up by their first album, and then The Avoided Sun, which remains one of my favourite albums in general! I am also extremely fond of their single Adore, for the b-side on it: an illusion. I kept up with listening to all their releases until LIGHTNING, after which (for some strange reason), I fell out of touch with their new material.
All this is to say that, despite not recognizing all that many songs that were played, I am definitely a fan of their sound in general and had a really great time.
Getting into the venue felt very dramatic in and of itself as we climbed the gargantuan stairs to head up to the second level, rounding the curved outer corridor once inside to find the quadrant and row that our seat was located in. Though I was high up in the stands, I had a great view of both the stage, and the Japanese flag hanging in the centre of the ceiling.
When the lights in the room darkened and lynch. began taking to the stage, we all stood and from there, the performance was dark, loud, and filled with melodic pockets of respite. Aside from their awesome sound, the visual effects that accompanied the performance were impressive as well (flame machines! lasers! cool videography!).
Hazuki kept remarking that the whole experience felt surreal, that even being on the stage that all of them had been aiming for for so long, it was hard to believe that it was actually happening — or feel nervous, due to all the rehearsing they’d done.
Everyone gave a heartfelt speech around the midway point, but none more than their bassist, who took accountability for his actions that had led to the original postponement of their performance at the milestone of a venue, apologizing, and thanking everyone for still believing in and supporting the band.
The air was kind of cleared after that and they played the remaining songs on their setlist with renewed vigor, or rather, with a different sort of vigor. Hazuki’s vocals, more often than not, dragged us all to hell.
Right towards the end, they brought out a daruma, which Hazuki explained had been gifted to them by a fan, years back, hoping they would (I think — I may be mis-remembering) do a nationwide Zepp venue tour. They accomplished that and so drew in the daruma’s first eye. Their next goal was to play Budoukan, and they’d been holding on to the daruma for years so that, tonight, they could finally fulfill that dream and colour in the daruma’s second eye.
Which they did: Hazuki took out a black marker and drew in another eye.
Then, he placed the daruma onstage where it could oversee the last song(s) they played for the evening.
It was a truly awesome performance, and I’m glad I got to attend for such a big milestone.
When it was over, and we had clapped until they left the stage, people were asked to leave the venue by section to try to avoid overcrowding the exits and the subway entrances. Even after I left, I hung around off to the side of the subway entrance just to let the majority of people leave before me, as I wasn’t in any mood to be squished inside a train carriage if I could avoid it.
After the relative heat of the venue, being out in the cool (albeit damp) night air was a relief, though when I finally did get home (picking up something to eat along the way), I was more than ready to get out of my damp clothes and eat while watching the Japan v Germany world cup match. Then take a long, hot bath, and curl up in bed, to go back to sleep…
I had to take a later shinkansen than I’d intended because of weekend crowds or delays (I’m not certain which) so got to the livehouse with just a couple minutes to spare. Fortunately, this was not my first time going to a live in Saga’s hometown of 郡山, so I didn’t get lost at any point along the way.
I have such fond memories of this livehouse, being the first cozy-size one I attended back in 2019 for Saga’s birthday. As if the main set and encore hadn’t been amazing enough, Saga and Hiroto returned onstage a third time and played すべてへ, with Saga singing on acoustic guitar. Thankfully, he uploaded a part of it on Twitter afterwards, because it was such a joy to listen to that night, and listening to the clip now just brings those memories right back.
That was a special live in and of itself, one that is forever imprinted in my memory, and this live will be too. They rocked. We were all so happy to be able to raise our voices with them again!
Unlike in 新潟NEXS, 郡山 Hip Shot Japan didn’t have any areas demarcated on the floor, so it held more attendees and we weren’t as restricted in our positions on the floor.
Since I arrived later, I was more towards the back at the foot of the steps (which was still incredibly close to the stage), and thankfully on the 下手 side! But I ended up dancing my way sideways to having a clear view of Saga, so I got to enjoy seeing (and feeling) all those gorgeous, badass bass skills in action all night.
And hold my arms out to cheer Saga on
＼(^o^)／♡♡♡♡♡♪︎♪︎♪︎♪︎♪︎｢沙我！！｣
Saga gave 焔ちゃん’s neck so many kisses and raised that bass up to such honorable heights ❤️🔥💋
The lighting at 郡山 Hip Shot Japan was denser, more brilliant, and included lasers, which was so cool! They also had some smoke machines going at points.
Living Dead is a song with a marching beat, but it also feels like you’re tunnelling through the earth, in a way. That contrast in feel is really frickin’ cool. They played Answer next, whose texture I really love, and everyone in the audience was dancing to the brightest sections of the music. This led into an even brighter classic from 2007. I felt so happy when I heard them start TSUBASA.! Ohhh, the memories… It is one of those rare singles of theirs that didn’t actually end up on a subsequent album, and is such a great song.
From there, the mood got a little darker, a little more luxurious, and they began to play the delectable, the danceable, the gorgeous… 華! The live arrangement, in constant evolution, is SO GOOD! Every time! AHHHHHHHHHHH I was so happy that they played it! Next up was Moondance, made even more of a pleasure due to the fact that we’d been warmed up dancing to 華 first (delightful setlist pairing by Saga).
But man, FIVE JOKER then folded the coolness factor into the mix. I thought I was hearing a slightly different arrangement, but either way, I love the bass in this song and I was groooooving to it. After which, 界 began, and we embraced a more sombre atmosphere in order to worship once again at the temple of アリス九號. Together with the members of the band, we we sending out a prayer to the gods of rock, with this night of musical revelry as our sacred offering 🙏
Yes. It’s that good.
Envy, which followed, really filled the room in its own particular way, with Saga’s very clear plucking of the strings ringing out. It builds slowly, with patience, to an incredible climax.
INSOMNIA is a song that I really love, but for whatever reason, I hadn’t ever expected to end up at a live where they would play it. I was so surprised and in awe when it started… Saga kept playing acoustic guitar for the length of the song too. I’d never seen or heard a live rendition before, so I don’t know how they’d normally perform it, but having the acoustic guitar in the mix was captivating. And as ever, the way the vocals crest and fall in the song was beautiful. Then the tail end of the song faded, and four members left the stage…
At this, Nao got up on the front podium, and like the night before, he got the crowd riled up, clapping and calling out in time with his Drum Solo. Very fun, and his drumming, as ever, sounded great! The others returned to an energized audience and they all jumped into playing Roar. During yesterday’s after talk, Show and Saga suggested an adjustment to the furi for the Love-love Hate-hate call sections, and today we tried the new way and it did emphasize the energy of the song much better. Even without the rap section, this song is badass, but the rap takes it to the next l e v e l.
But oh, what a thrill of excitement I felt when PHOENIX started. It marked ALICE NINE. returning from their hiatus, and turned into music the sense of triumph we all felt upon knowing they were back. I was so amazed by this song when I first heard it, and every time I hear it now, I still feel such pride in them. This song was the lead track on their re-debut EP (as A9) whose recording they crowdfunded for, and my name, along with everyone else who backed it, is in the booklet. Pretty amazing, to have been a little part of their musical history in that way. Saga’s bassline is kickass in this song, and I love the vocal melody Show sings in it. The energy was incredible during this performance and I just let my body flow along with the music. Bliss.
We all worked up a reeeeal good sweat dancing to RAINBOWS, doing the A-jump, and giving all our love to this amazing classic. They rock so hard and make this song sound so damn good every time! Next up was Funeral, and it sounds SO wicked cool live. It truly does. I love Saga’s ribbony bass line in it, the solo was nice and gruff/grungy in this performance, and really, everyone’s parts sound so cool with everyone getting their moment to stand out in this song. Exodus: deepened the mood in the room with its contrasting growls and softer melodic sections, and that led into… 開戦前夜! We all let loose during the course of the song, getting wild together just before the end of the main set. And as was becoming customary during this tour, they again ended their main set with Farewell Flowers so that we could all catch our breath and be soothed by the song.
Shortly after they left the stage, we started clapping and calling out for an Encore in waves… again, I meant it when I cried out ‘En-co-ru!’ with every fiber of my being! We love you, come back, let’s rock some more!
Thankfully they heard us an obliged, the stage lights gettong bright again as the members returned to the stage. It was Re:Born that they played first and ‘oh my god’ was the thought that popped into my mind first. I wasn’t expecting this song, and it just… I felt so very alive and so much joy being in the room to experience it. I remember hearing the premiere of the song during their 13th anniversary live broadcast on NICONICO and being completely blown away by it. It was like breathing fresh air at that point in my life. Hearing it was like breaking a curse that I hadn’t realized I’d been under, and after that, I went back to my 居場所, my happy place, fully. And this particular performance definitely upheld and added to this song’s particular magic.
What came next was 春夏秋冬 and I went absolutely wild for this one. I’m sure I heard this song before at another live, but much like VELVET last night, this particular performance was so euphoric, so filled with glee and nostalgia and happiness that ALICE NINE. still rock the room as hard as they ever have, that this is the version now most prominent in my memory. These classics have such energetic, well-defined furitsuke as well, so that there’s no space or need to dance in your own way. It’s extremely fun to dance along with everyone else. And dance, we did! Then, of course, at the end, they all gathered together at the front of the stage and played with a foot up on the podium there, shoulder to shoulder (Nao guarding their backs)… my younger self would never believe that I actually got to experience that fundamentally aliceniney song live, in person. What a delight.
In a short MC after they finished performing 春夏秋冬, I believe Show admitted that in their early days, they added in the oioioi/fist-pump section during the Tora solo because they thought it’d be cool. Had everyone in the audience giggling over it. Hey, it’s there to stay, we love it, and it’s part of アリス九號.’s long and storied history!
To follow in the footsteps of a band sound classic, they played their classic-in-the-making of a different feel, Grace. This song sounds so complex–and it is–yet when they play it live, it comes together so beautifully, so naturally, and lights up the room. I love this song… the sound is so dynamic, so full of vitality, the way it soars and dives.
I’m so glad I found their music by chance.
Saga’s beautiful, cool, and unexpected compositions continue to enchant me, and rock my world.
It’s incredibly fun to see bands you love live in concert… but it’s life-affirming to go see your favourite band in person. After so long… what a joy.
I did hang around outside for a bit after the live ended, but it was a getting chilly and drizzling, so I eventually just said a silent ‘see you next time’ to that beloved livehouse (and a certain musician still in it), and made my way slowly back to the station, stopping or wandering down a side street as I liked each time something caught my eye, each time I experienced a sense of déjà vu.
It is a strange feeling to know that a place you wanted so badly to go and see for yourself, a place that you stare around in wonder at, is as everyday and as commonplace as it gets to just about everyone else that surrounds you. Saga grew up here, in Japan, in this city, and probably dreamed of visiting somewhere else at some point too. I’m glad I got to walk these streets again.
It was relatively dry but chilly as I leaned against a wall to wait for the shinkansen to pull up to the platform. And then the train carried me back to Tokyo, memories of the incredible live I’d just attended replaying in my head…
I worked up a serious sweat… before the live. I legitimately got lost trying to find the right exit out of the Niigata station. I knew which direction I needed to head in, looking at my map, but every exit I tried led in the wrong direction and I was really worried I wouldn’t make it. At one point, I truly thought there wasn’t enough time left before the performance started. But I finally found the right hallway, it led me out in the right direction, and once on the street, it was easy to go the rest of the way.
I was so relieved. A… tiny bit sheepish too.
Of course, later I realized I would likely have been able to get in even after the live started, but that’s not something I would want to do if I could help it.
The livehouse was small and cozy with clear squares marked on the floor in tape for attendees to stand in. I got a square in the back right corner near the door, and stood diagonally so that I could get a clear view of Saga. Definitely a good idea to have worn my platforms, otherwise I would have been a shorty struggling to see past the people in front of me. I had a clear view of everyone on the stage, though.
I know I’m probably going to say this every time, but… the setlist was excellent.
I’m such a nerd, I had to actually hold my glasses in my hand while headbanging to prevent them from flying off into the crowd やばかったよw (’twas crazy lol)
The classical SE they began using earlier this year (Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony) is so epic, and is right on par with how elated I feel when they do a live. Everyone clapped as they took to the stage to the triumphant swell of the music, and then… they began to play.
Opening with organ music and dramatic lighting, Living Dead feels as emotionally heavy as the weight of the steady march that characterizes the song. I could hardly believe my eyes, that my favourite band was right there living, breathing, playing right in front of me. As I watched, swaying to the music in a daze, elated, following along with some of the dances, they transitioned into playing Answer. The venue started to heat up along with the tempo of the song and reality was starting to hit. I was really, truly there.
The next song, Show explained, was for all of us — WHITE PRAYER! I thought I was going to lose my mind, I was so excited. I love the live arrangement of this one, along with Saga’s flowy bass line in it. 懐かしいいいいしか言えない！Again, with this song, the whole room was thrumming with movement, dancing together to a song that is such a classic in their discography. Then they started playing the opening notes of 百花繚乱, and things got really wild! As an older song, it also had a very well-established dance, and the whole room was moving together furiously excited… I was one happy, nostalgic 九組! It was so much fun!
As Moondance began, Show definitely showed us how the くねくね dance was supposed to be done… this was something Saga explained in his GRACE Commentary livestream before the start of the tour — that everyone should move their hips and sway to the song in a sexy way. It sounded so good live, and was indeed a pleasure to dance to. I love Saga’s bass line in this song, and that was what I was following as I moved and reveled in the sound. When the song ended, Saga took up position, bracing himself in order to play BABYLON‘s opening bass line and slap… this was my first time experiencing the song live, and it was utterly cool to fall into and be immersed in the music for this one.
In the echoing ending notes of BABYLON, the mood shifted.
The stage went dark, and after a long, low tone, 界‘s sutra began, booming through the room, transforming it with sound. Saga had explained how the song was meant to evoke the sense of coming to worship in the temple of ALICE NINE. in an interview… and that description is bang-on for how I felt, listening to it. While Saga’s deep voice rang out, repeating the sutra, I put my hands together in prayer and felt like I was being put into a trance. The livehouse was our place of worship. Music, the deity we were supplicating. Sound from vibration that conveys scenery, emotion, memory…
When that powerhouse of a song finished, Saga set down his red bass, Homura, and picked up his blue acoustic guitar. So began Envy. The song felt so beautiful live, with slow, deliberate plucking of the acoustic guitar’s strings, and slow, intentional singing from Show. The sound was so full in the room and I just swayed with the flow of the song, carried away, hand over my heart.
Saga put his red bass back on and after a quiet pause to accommodate the switch, 昴 began. Not only was it absolutely beautiful, the fact that we as the audience could actually sing with them made it even more meaningful. 幸せだった。The song really unfolds fully live, with Saga singing backup and the audience joining in too. I’ll never forget the intense sense of beauty and of longing that I felt when I watched the live footage from Untitled VANDALISM. And how beautiful it was when I heard it the first time during the FC trip I took, in a planetarium live. But after all the restrictions, after all the waiting… being able to sing it together this time in particular was a singular experience that I won’t soon forget.
Be as one…
Some piano began to play as all the members aside from Nao left the stage. He got up as well, but in order to come to the front podium. First, he got us all clapping, then he got us all shouting in unison, and then we combined the two actions. Nao returned to his drum set and started srumming to the beat he’d gotten us started on, and from there he whipped us all up into a frenzy of shouting, clapping, and hand-waving along to the Drum Solo… the drumming throughout the live was crisp and on point too!
Finally, the other four members of the band came back onstage in order to start playing Roar which is a total powerhouse of a song, and incredibly melodic to boot. The drum-rap-bass solo section is crisp, sharp, and then velvety-soft. Which brings us to ヴェルヴェット itself. When this song started playing, I was ridiculously excited. The energy in the room for this song was just awesome. Everyone fist-pumping together and getting wild for this classic… this might even have been my first time hearing it in person! But even if it weren’t, something about this performance really put it at the top of the list in my memory.
As if that hadn’t been enough nostalgia for one 九組 to take, they started playing RAINBOWS, and I was elated. Elated! The stage lights cutting through the darkness of the room in every colour imaginable gives the song an incredible air, and there’s no question that we were partying out hearts out. Saga gave the middle finger when everyone was doing the A-jump. Badass. Show hit the high note at the end and it was awesome. That song always takes me back and is one hell of a good time at lives.
In a change of pace, they played Funeral next, and its forward momentum and many layers of detail and sound texture sounded amazing. This was followed by Exodus:, which took us further into the depths that Funeral had pulled us into. Next came 開戦前夜, which I was experiencing live for the first time; it was epic. An incredible release of tension in the room. Made me wish I wore contacts so I could headbang with even more wild abandon! To finish their main set, they played Farewell Flowers, which Show described as a song filled with the utmost amount of love. After serenading us with it, they put down their instruments and left the stage to to sound of our applause.
It wasn’t long before, in the dim light of the stage, we all began clapping and then chanting ‘encore!’ in waves. This was only the third live since early 2020 where concertgoers had been able to raise their voices during performances, so it must have been a huge relief (and pleasure) for the band members to hear fans actually calling out ‘encore!’ again instead of just clapping. I was certainly happy to say it. I sure as hell meant it! We kept up our call for a while, and then the stage lights brightened for the Encore, the members returning to the stage to even more of our delighted applause.
I was so happy when they began playing Ray… I love that song, both in terms of its sound and of its gorgeous lyrics. It was so pretty live. They followed this with Daybreak, which is such an uplifting song, and I was totally mouthing the words behind my mask, so grateful to be there in the moment! Finally, to end their set on an even higher note, they began to play Grace. I was completely in the zone for this song, in my bliss, following the furi most of the time, but also waving my hands and fingers in my own way along to the beautiful complexities of this song’s sound. It’s amazing live, a true beauty in their discography.
I felt at peace when the song ended, clapping as the members again set down their instruments, and made their own exits off the stage.
Saga gave 焔ちゃん’s neck a kiss of appreciation before putting his bass down in its stand, and then blew a kiss to the crowd as well, waving and leaving with a quiet smile.
I felt a bit dazed, but so happy as I left the room as well to go outside and line up for the after-live Talk Event. I decided to use my ticket on this particular night in order to attend Saga and Show’s talk, and after a short wait, the staff ushered us back inside, checked our tickets, and then directed us to go back inside the event space and sit on the floor.
Here are a few highlights:
Show prompted Saga to talk about his job-quitting amnesia excuse story (originally told during an Alice9Channel episode), which was a preface to them discussing the fact that Saga actually has an extremely good memory… for instance, he remembered everyone else’s lines from NUMBER SIX. when they were filming that movie. Meanwhile, Show’s memory isn’t quite as good and he really has to work hard to remember lyrics and things, but has found that sometimes writing them down in full helps.
They brought up the fact that they noticed someone dancing during Grace as if conducting an orchestra. Show had apparently discussed with Saga that it would be good to make a song with that sort of air, but they were surprised someone had actually danced to it that way.
They discussed the Love-Love Hate-Hate call section of Roar, both agreeing that, so far, it hadn’t had the oomph they’d been imagining. They suggested that for future lives, we should put emphasis on the echoes of Love! and Hate! by raising our fists with the repetition of each word, to give the pairs a strong finish. (Edit: In subsequent lives, we actually began jumping up with hands raised to emphasize the echoed words!)
Saga explained that something about the initial bass phrases in BABYLON were tricky and frustrating, but in the moment, I didn’t understand the specifics… afterward, I came to the realization that BABYLON was tricky for this tour because Saga’s stage outfit includes arm restraints. So given that Saga decides the setlists, he was kind of poking fun at himself for including a song that would be extra-difficult for him.
The crew were packing away the stage behind them, and eventually someone on their staff called out from around the corner to advise them to wrap up the talk and make their exit, which they did, seeming slightly miffed at the staff rushing them along.
The entire live, the subsequent talk event, that moment of sitting and listening to them chat — all of it felt surreal to me. It had been years since I’d been in the same room with them… it felt so damn good to be back.
I didn’t originally buy a ticket to this performance because I had worried my flight might get delayed and I wouldn’t get to Japan in time (anxious thoughts are so often far-fetched that way), and I also worried I might get terrible jet-lag and not feel up to going anywhere the day after arriving. Well, I’m happy to say that that definitely wasn’t the case, and I was incredibly excited to head out to attend this live, meaning I’d be attending all four remaining performances on the tour.
This also turned out to be my first time buying a same-day ticket (当日券), and I’m strangely happy that I now have that sort of ticket to add to my collection! It was certainly an experience (read: a stressful albeit somewhat comical one) to get so lost and turned around in the station but to still make it in time anyway.
I’m glad I did. What an amazing performance to kick off this trip with.
I love アリス九號.
They really fucking rock.
.
No longer in a rush, I walked back the way I had come, my body still filled with the trailing notes of the live, warm at the memory of feeling Saga’s bass line fill the room firsthand… at experiencing all of those songs in concert.
Knowing I would get to do it three more times before the end of the month…
幸せだった。
P.S. When checking Google Maps just to make sure I could take the exact same route in reverse to get home (since it was late), I accidentally pressed the walking route option, and apparently it would take nearly three days. I almost burst out laughing in public.
Yeeeeah, I skipped that route… riding the shinkansen was more than scenic enough an adventure for me that evening, thank you very much.
For breakfast, I was really intent on eating, well… doughnuts. The shop I wanted to try had amazing reviews and was supposed to be open, but when I actually went there, I couldn’t get in. The door was locked. I couldn’t even find the backup café I’d been intent on getting a rainbow latte from. So I turned around and headed the opposite way up the street, towards the café I had intended to go to later in the afternoon.
Yeah, my brilliant plan had been to hang out in cafés until mid-afternoon, sample treats, translate ALICE NINE. lyrics, and do some edits to my mom’s memoir.
I did that… well, um, kind of.
More on that later.
On the way early to my intended afternoon café, I picked up some cookies from a bakery to make up for the missed doughnut opportunity earlier, and with a bag of cookies in-hand (practicing a herculean amount of self-control in not eating them immediately), I took the long way to my destination. The scenic route.
Rooster Coffee was all incredibly tall windows and beautiful industrial design on the inside, with quirky little details to pull it all together. The sign in front of the order counter implores you to believe in magic. To the right is a bowl of kibble to treat the four-legged friends that must wait outside. A pride flag hangs from the second floor railing, and the lids for coffee mugs come in an assortment of colours.
I ordered a mocha and a savoury scone, then climbed the sunlit steps to the second level, where an entire section of seats lay empty. I settled in, munched, sipped… all the while, checking the new photos and information my mom had sent me for her memoir. I was astonished, faced with photos of her I’d never seen before, back when she had worked for radio stations and hosted morning shows. It’s one thing to read her recollections of such or to hear them growing up, but quite another to see photos. She’d sent a photo of her and my grandparents together when she’d graduated from nursing school too. I’d seen her class portrait, but never the photo of her with my grandparents.
The mocha was almost done by the time I switched to translating, getting GRADATION done, as well as some kousai STRIPE, and then I got it into my head that I wanted to see if I could get a compact wireless keyboard ahead of my trip to Japan in mid-November. I researched and found a keyboard that fit what I needed, and the store it seemed to be in stock at was a fair walk, but close enough on foot. So I gathered my things and set out.
What I didn’t realize until I got there was that it would take me right past the Eaton Centre, which was the first place my Aunt JG took my mom and I when we went to visit her together for the first time. She took us on the subway from Scarborough, and then brought us up to a restaurant that might have been Milestones, and we had lunch before going into the mall to window shop.
This time, I was excited and rather surprised to notice that a full size MUJI shop had sprung up in the square, a well-known store which originated in Japan. If I hadn’t already had my trip to Japan planned, I would have been hanging out in all the Japanese shops and restaurants I kept seeing… there certainly weren’t nearly that many when last I’d visited! It was a rather comforting sight.
The keyboard, by the way? Somehow the site had glitched or shown be the wrong page, because when I arrived I found out that the keyboard was completely sold out. Still, the walk itself was interesting so I wasn’t too upset in the end.
I headed back to my room, cookies still safely in my purse, and given that I’d have to head over to the concert rather soon after, I decided to pick up a bit of pizza for supper. Yep. Pizza and cookies. Quite the indulgence!
I scurried all over my room trying to put together the right outfit for the concert after I finished eating and washing up. I must have re-done my lip makeup three times… which was extra silly considering I wouod be wearing a mask the whole time (with the Japan trip coming up in November, I have no interest in taking unnecessary chances!). Finally, I arrived at a style that felt pretty good, cuddled into a favourite cardigan, and a cool, visual Saga t-shirt.
It was painless to get to the venue via the subway, and I strolled around the entire circumference of the area before going to get settled into my seat. I had an incredibly clear view of the stage.
Before long, Poppy made her entrance and warmed up the crowd with a high-energy set, playing guitar for some of her songs. I’d only heard a few of them before the concert, so I went in not knowing quite what to expect. I loved her shrieks and screams, that was the main thing that stuck out to me!
What I hadn’t known beforehand was that Jane’s Addiction had had to cancel the Toronto tour date (along with a few others) due to injury to allow for recovery, so Our Lady Peace, from right here in Toronto, had stepped up to the plate in their stead.
It took me a good minute to catch on to what had happened, but then I started recognizing the songs they were playing and, man… that took me back. It took me back to when I’d spend weekends tuned in to MTV to get caught up on the latest music, Our Lady Peace’s song among the music video mixes and countdowns. They put on a great set.
Somewhere in the middle, the frontman explained that when he’d been a teen (definitely too young to be going into some of the venues), he’d gone in to see Jane’s Addiction and the music had blown his mind. Thus, as a tribute to their recovering fellows, they played a cover of a Jane’s Addiction song.
We applauded as they ended their set and left the stage, and then the lights brightened again so that the stage could be configured one final time for headliner The Smashing Pumpkins.
We waited, shifting with anticipation, some concert-goers dashing off to get last-minute drinks.
At last, the lights dimmed again, and the room sparked with the excitement of everyone in the audience, me included, of course. Before the band took to the stage, the stylized image of a moth hovered on an LED screen as an instrumental began to play, and we all waited, entranced.
I’ve been listening to the podcast Thirty-Three with William Patrick Corgan since it began airing alongside the tour, and hearing all of the details that have gone into each song on the new album, the story that it tells, the way that the songs tie in to past songs and albums, and all of the topics that he discusses with fellow hosts and the guest they welcome on to the podcast each week really heightened the anticipation I felt going in to the concert.
As to why I wore a shirt with Saga on it to the performance, aside from quite simply loving Saga, he’s also the reason why I became a fan of The Smashing Pumpkins in the first place. Though I’d been familiar with and liked 1979 and their cover of Landslide by Fleetwood Mac growing up, I hadn’t ever gone further than that. After all, these were the days before streaming, when you could possibly find the songs to sample online, but it was tricky. You had to be lucky to catch a song on the radio, catch a music video on TV, or just bite the bullet and buy a CD without knowing what it was like. It was slow-going for music videos to get uploaded on Youtube, and before that, you’d have to find them here and there in pockets of the internet. In its own way, it was fun.
So I didn’t take a chance until I came across a translated interview of Saga’s that cited The Smashing Pumpkins both as a favourite band and as an influence. And indeed, you can hear that influence in some of Saga’s compositions! Given the fact that I already knew some of their songs and had faith in Saga’s taste in music, in December of 2007, I got a copy of the Pumpkins’ greatest hits.
That, and a copy of ALICE NINE.’s newest album at the time, Alpha (whose first track was inspired by a track from Zeitgeist!)
That December, we were headed out east to visit family for Christmas in the Maritimes (Nova Scotia, to be exact) so I ripped both my new CDs, loaded them onto my trusty old MP3 player at the time, and took those with me. Those CDs got me through the holidays. And beyond — I wrote SO much while listening to those CDs, and of course CDs of theirs that I bought later, too.
I was glad to bring Saga with me to the concert, even in that small way.
Once the moth had blinked out of existence, we were treated to an utterly psychedelic starburst of a display on the LED screen. It felt surreal. There was a playful lilt to the concert that I hadn’t at all expected going into it, and that I really enjoyed… not that it took away any of the gravitas from the more serious songs they performed. The setlist was a mix of older classics and their newest fare, and though I truly enjoyed the concert in its entirety, a few songs did stick out in my memory in particular.
I lost my mind a little bit when they started playing Bullet With Butterfly Wings, and then even more for Ava Adore. There’s something about that song that has always pulled me in, and to hear it live was such a pleasure.
The dual-accoustic version of Tonight, Tonight, prefaced by some really warmhearted banter between Billy and James, was probably the prettiest performance of the night. Pretty is the word that comes to mind, with the way the LED screens twinkled behind them with stars. Of course, with scarecrow-like props behind them, the performance also had a slightly absurd, even spooky tinge to it, which seems very on-point for them. I certainly appreciated the contrast and the end of the song left me in a beatific state of mind.
Stand Inside Your Love is a song I have a deep attachment to, and hearing it live was so much different than listening to it through my headphones. There was a power to it, standing in the audience, that I hadn’t expected. The sound filled the room and it felt grounded, the way the words and the music sank into my consciousness.
I of the Mourning is another favourite — something about the music and the lyrics just captures all those times in my life that I’ve felt weighed down by depression, but still go out into the world anyway, holding close the things that still tether me and make the next step feel possible.
I can’t recall which song Jimmy’s drum solo was in, but it was awesome.
Zero is another song I have always had a particular attachment to (like many listeners) and it packed a hell of a punch. A song with bite. But even so, Billy made room for a bit of levity, if I remember properly, to interject “WPC — that’s me!” at some point, which gave me a good chuckle.
But Disarm was the song that really made me feel emotional. It was cathartic to hear that song fill the room and I cried, glad to be in that moment, experiencing it.
It was an amazing (weird, psychedelic, surreal, romantic) night, and I’m glad I got to be a small part of it, off in the stands.
I made my way back to my room, feeling at once lighthearted, at once pensive.
Last night I made my way to Red Bird on Bank in order to attend Moonfruits‘ album pre-release party, with an opening act by harpist and singer Éveline.
The music venue and school is a rather new one in the city of Ottawa, having opened its doors just earlier this year, but it is a warm and well-thought-out space, perfect for the sort of intimate folk concert that Moonfruits and Éveline regaled us with last night.
I was so engrossed in site maintenance yesterday evening that I barely gave myself any time at all to throw on an outfit and fly out of my front door in order to catch my bus. But catch the bus I did. And, as luck would have it, I made it on time and was able to settle into an empty seat towards the back of the room before the lights dimmed in order for the show to begin.
Éveline, une artiste montréalais, made her lone entrance onto the stage, sitting down and pulling her harp close. She quietly explained the significance of each song, frequently switching fluidly between French and English mid-sentence, mid-thought. Though she usually plays with a band, yesterday night, it was just us, her, and a plethora of pedals to create effects when needed. She admitted she felt a little dressed-down without her fellows, a little nervous — but she had nothing to fear.
There is something utterly enchanting about the sound of a harp.
Her soft, raw singing, along with the twinkling fullness of the harp’s many chords transported us all to the setting of each song. Coupled with the dim lighting, it would have been enough to lull everyone into a peaceful, dream-filled sleep.
We gave her a big warm round of applause when she finished her set, and then the lights were raised again to allow everyone to mingle and chat while the stage was prepared for the main act. Though I didn’t particularly participate much in the conversation, the three people who had sat down on either side of me had some very interesting connections to one another. One person was the brother of Alex (one half of the folk duo, Moonfruits). The other two people were a chef and a baker who found out right then and there that they actually followed and were fans of one another on Instagram. It was kind of a magnificent coincidence. The chef was there with Alex’s brother, and the baker works at a bread shop that Alex and Kait often frequent, which is why she began going to their shows and how she became a fan.
When they asked me how I was connected to Moonfruits, I had a comparatively boring answer: I saw them perform once in 2016 alongside Georgian Bay at LIVE! on Elgin for their Ste-Quequepart Tour and became a fan of both that night for their beautiful folk harmonies.
Eventually, the lights dimmed again, everyone quieted down, and Moonfruits took to the stage, along with eight other musicians for support, Éveline among them. All of them settled into their positions, and then the main act began. They played their upcoming album Salt, Alex and Kait taking their time to set the scene for each song, delighting the audience with anecdotes (both funny and endearing) while they tuned between, well… tunes.
It was an intimate, soulful performance.
They invited us to join in on some of the choruses (We all do well when we all do well), and filled the room with their warm, personal songs, rounding out their performance with a soothing lullaby, Moon Cradle (the video, below, crafts such a down-to-earth and mystical atmosphere around it). We gave them a standing ovation at the end, and were delighted when they almost immediately returned to perform an encore for us.
The final song they played for their encore, their own rendition of the traditional folk song À la claire fontaine, was for them a song with deep significance. Before they began playing, they explained that they had performed it for Alex’s father at his bedside shortly before he had passed away. They invited us all, before taking up their instruments again, to join them in singing along. It was not a surprise that most people in the room did add their voices, though as soon as we got to the refrain, I was so overcome with emotion that I started crying quietly in my seat, finding my own meaning in the words and the melody of the song. It was beautiful.
Il y a longtemps que je t’aime, Jamais je ne t’oublierai.
Long has it been that I have loved you Never will I forget you.
Though Moonfruits do not have a version of this traditional folk song online, the following cover, performed in a much different setting, can give you a sense of how beautiful it sounded.
When, finally, the band left the stage after accepting another standing ovation from us in the audience, a loud buzz took over the room as everyone discussed what a good performance it had been, mingling with the musicians and filing toward the merch table to preorder the album and buy the coffee blend and homemade pickles that were on offer.
Salt is set to release in early October, and I look forward to listening to it again.
It was late, and I had to slip out quietly in order to catch my bus, pensive in the wake of the performance. The bus trundled up the street, picking up other late-night event-goers returning home, like me. And as I disembarked and walked the rest of the way to my apartment, I reconsidered and stopped on the sidewalk of a quiet street to admire the harvest moon, bright and full as it was.
Scout was rather dejected when I got home, this having been the first time I was out nearly past midnight since adopting him this past spring. But he soon perked up with my reassurance and was back to his usual, playful self by the time I turned off my laptop and prepared to go to sleep.
Listening to musicians performing songs in person is truly an experience that has no replacement.
Their next album, titled GRACE, will be released on the 2nd of November 2022, and will kick off a nationwide tour that same month, which will end in a grand finale to be played on the 24th of December 2022. They also announced the commencement of preorders being taken (through the fanclub only) for the limited edition of their new album, which will include all 10 tracks of the album on a CD, along with a Bluray disc containing the album’s two music videos along with the entirety of their finale performance for the Brutal Revelation tour this past spring.
As if that weren’t enough great news for one day, they also unveiled their newest music video, which promotes the last track on their new album.
Grace
The album name is in uppercase, while the title track is in lowercase. And yes, it does share the name of a compilation album they did a limited release for back in 2016, but this deeply-significant word and concept clearly deserved a revival.
One of Saga’s influences going way back was Jeff Buckley’s album Grace, and just last year for their 17th Anniversary live, in which they played the entirety of their GEMINI album, they played the Buckley track Grace in the livehouse while fans were still finding their seats and waiting for the concert to start. I’ve made no secret over the years of how much I love and have been inspired by ALICE NINE.’s album GEMINI so being able to watch that performance as it happened, even from afar, was in all honesty a dream come true for me. It was bliss. That being said, I am also a fan of the album Grace, which I started listening to because of the fact that Saga blogged about it years ago, and it’s continued to influence me over the years as well. Thanks, Saga! 🙂
I don’t know if the new album title (or the title of this lead track) had already been decided, even back then, but I thought that was a beautiful connection. A little premonition of what was to come, back when Saga first tweeted a hint that a very significant album for ALICE NINE. was on the horizon.
Grace is a Saga composition, and one that has been in the works since early 2020, though Saga tweeted to say that it wasn’t originally meant to be released as an ALICE NINE. song, which is why there are vestiges of Saga in it (that is, Saga sang extensive harmonies with Show in it). I’ve included the translated tweets below. If you compare the still cover image used on Funeral to that of Grace before you watch the video, you’ll note that Funeral features only Show on it, while Grace features a still of the entire band mid-playing. That contrast in initial presentation alone in the context of the album is very interesting. But the songs themselves also sound incredibly different in feel and atmosphere. I’ve already written at length about how much I love Funeral, so I’ll just get right into my love for Grace.
March 31st 2020 In times like this I make songs I’m making one right now
By the way, this isn’t related to the album or to the band (Saga uploaded a clip of the song-in-progress, which we now know is Grace, and was referring to their album NIGHTLESS CITY EDEN)
September 9th 2022 I’ve had Grace since then, you know. I had neither the intention of making it the lead track of the album nor of doing it with the band, but That’s why, as a sort of relic, I’m singing in it.
As as soon as you press play, it is immediately apparent that Grace is tied to a classic, well-loved ALICE NINE. song: the beautiful name.
A prélude, maybe, or else a companion piece, an homage.
Is this perhaps the long-held idea that Saga mentioned in the last album-related tweet? An idea that Saga then began making a reality in early 2020? We’ll have to wait for interviews and talk events to learn more.
With the long, quiet lead-in, the anticipation builds to an incredible point; I wonder if the long lead-in and outro is just for the music video, or whether all eight minutes are part of the recording on the album proper. Grace is wonderfully layered and complex with a beautiful, uplifting melody; those harmonies between Show and Saga feel like an updraft, continually pulling the song skyward.
Grace is expansive, but it takes its time to unfold.
No rushing. A steady march to take in the glorious scale of the music.
The way that the music bursts with light at 5:47 is nothing short of magnificent.
I am in awe.
This song is a thing of beauty and grace.
The アリス九號.
And in the video, at the end, they all huddle under furs, snow falling over them, waiting for the arrival of spring. Which, of course, is their joy-filled classic, the beautiful name.
The end of the voyage and the day to be graced.
Incorporating lots of slow-motion shots, along with the lengthy intro and outro ending on a shot of a door standing before an ocean, the music video further underscores the epic scale of the music.
Show revealed in a tweet that 武瑠 Takeru (through Akubi Inc Tokyo) was the artistic director of this music video, following his previous work on their CYAN video released in the summer of 2020. Just like the last time, 武瑠 Takeru framed them in a way that hadn’t really been done before. There is something to be said for having a fan take the reins!
Show, September 9th 2022 “Grace” Into irreplaceable days, we load love
I can’t say everything I want to about all the thoughts I have, so please let me talk about them another time. Thank you.
武瑠 Takeru, September 10th 2022 Following CYAN, I’ve been afforded the chance to produce an MV. “The アリス九號.” as a theme was big here, so the idea took some time to think of, but the slow motion staging opened up the creative path in one go. As did the homage to a past song. Once again, congratulations on your 18th anniversary.
Show replied again to Takeru this morning to say, very warmly,
“While busy with an overseas live and his own activities, I got a deep impression from Takeru, who didn’t compromise one bit on the direction of the project or MV. I’m truly grateful he undertook it with us.“
They managed to get trending on Twitter as well both before and after their live, which was all the more significant due to the fact that it coincided with the appearance of the harvest moon. Auspicious.
Grace is the sort of song that doesn’t need you to fully understand it right away. It is the type of song that sounds better with each listen, becoming fuller with each new detail of the sound strata you take notice of. I am going to be very excited to delve into the minutia of the lyrics on release day. Grace must have been spectacular to hear live, and I’m sure it will just become more beautiful as it is played and listened to, as time goes on. A classic in the making.
I think it may also be significant that in the 18th anniversary live, they played Waterfall just before Grace, a song which leads the listener into the beautiful name… those three songs together form quite a breathtaking flow of emotion. I love that they are all being woven together that way. I think it may also be safe to think, at this point, that “Grace” is the beautiful name.
Another element in the アリス九號. mythology given shape.
For the moment though, that’s just my own personal interpretation. We’ll have to wait and see whether they expound on this in interviews and comments in the coming weeks and months. Slowly, the world their music inhabits deepens, unfolds further.
As a longtime fan, I am so proud of them, and am very much looking forward to listening to the entire album, start to finish, when it comes out in two months.
This soundscape, this mindscape is worth the wait.
Saga is well-versed in the art of building anticipation.
With just over a week to go until their 18th anniversary live, Saga tweeted to reveal another detail regarding their next, as-yet-unnamed album, nearly a year to the day after first teasing the news that they were about to embark upon the creation of another deeply significant ALICE NINE. album. The very fact that they aren’t rushing with this release already marks it as being something different from usual, and I have no doubt that the wait is going to make it all the better, more meaningful.
For such a small message, the tweet manages to make a spectacular reveal. Not only did Saga create yet another song suite like their first groundbreaking experiment GEMINI, the latter half of this nearly twelve minute suite makes use of an idea that Saga had been holding on to for over ten years. What was the long-incubating idea? A melody? A sound texture? A technique?
沙我三昧！╰(*´︶`*)╯
I can only imagine, and am so very excited to find out, in time.
August 29th, 2021. Thank you for 17th theatre While I do think that GEMINI is a work that each person has an emotional attachment to, it is, as you might expect, an album with particularly deep significance for ALICE NINE.
It’s unclear whether it will surpass GEMINI However I get the sense that the time has come Where we must create an opus that wholly reveals Everything that the band is.
August 31st, 2022. Although a year has gone by, It’s unclear whether it surpassed GEMINI, but I created a song suite this time that approaches twelve minutes in length with an idea that just about surpasses GEMINI jammed into it The latter part of the song suite is an idea from over ten years ago
I don’t remember the true beginning of the events that followed, but I have a sense that I had spent the previous day at work. Where I worked was a strangely vertical, cramped area above someone’s rather gargantuan living room. I recognized the living room. It was either a very strange imagining of the living room of someone I grew up with, or it was a living room that I used to dream about as a child. Either way, my workstation was above this living room, which had a chasm in the centre of it. I never saw the chasm, I just had the very profound sense that it was there, and that that was why we kept our gazes high or level, and had to use things like ledges, bridges, and rope-swings to get from one side of the living room to the other. When I was in that lower, living room space, I felt like I was a kid again, interacting with other kids. Moving around and across the living room with trepidation, gravity, and a paradoxical ease that I may not felt as an adult. There, I played video games with the other kids whenever we reached the TV — more than likely, we were playing on N64, Dreamcast, or PlayStation, but I don’t remember any specific game or console from the dream. Up some steep, carpeted, curving stairs, was my cramped, carpeted workspace, with other coworkers. I didn’t recognize any of them, and maybe that is simply because I didn’t truly interact with any of them in the dream.
It was a new day.
It seems that I lived with my parents, or at least near enough to them that I could go over in the morning before work and ask if I could drive one of their four cars to my office. This is strange for two reasons: I do not currently and have never had a driver’s licence, and they have never had more than one car at any given time. To make matters stranger, after accepting, my parents told me to take the car “at the end”, a vintage vehicle, newly restored and looking pristine.
I protested, but they insisted.
Off we went to work — and I do mean “we”. My parents also insisted on coming along. I’m not certain what the rationale was, but when we arrived, my mother wanted to have a look around and, of course, chat with anyone in the vicinity. I felt very stressed, knowing this, but for whatever reason I had truly needed to borrow a car to get to work that morning, so I mustered up patience and tried to get on with things. Sure enough, as soon as we’d parked and gotten out of the car, she began chatting with everyone we passed, though thankfully, it seemed, not with anyone I worked for or with directly. From the outside, my office appeared to be a trailer, a truck, or a luxurious shipping container — that was the sense I had, even though I never looked at it directly during the dream. It seemed to have some sort of vertical protuberance, like a tower, jutting out of it. This small-seeming exterior of course belied the fact that the fully-carpeted interior contained an upper floor that served as an office for who-knows-how-many workers or companies, an enormous split-level main floor that served as the house of someone I had been friends or acquaintances with as a child, and in the centre of all of that (of course) a fucking abyss.
No big deal.
My mother wanted to come into the office and attempted to do so, despite my protests.
The next thing I remember is that I was just outside the back of a Winners, and that it was winter — or at least cold enough for me to have shrugged into what seemed to be a new coat before walking over. I didn’t work there. Nevertheless, I went through the back door — me and a couple pushing a cat in a coat in a stroller. I found the sight both endearing and bizarre. Though I did not seem to find it unusual to be entering the store from the nearly-unmarked back. The room that we found ourselves in was well-lit, but had strange dimensions, with a winding foot path cut through piles and stacks of children’s toys, mainly. The couple wheeled over to a miniature aisle (child-height) in order to look through new clothes for their curiously-calm cat.
In the top-left corner of the room, there was a very small flat escalator, moving in an oval around that small section of the room; a loop with no apparent purpose other than perhaps to entertain children and keep them in one place. I got on it and when I did, I was at such an angle that I could look through a large window set into that back corner, looking down into the rest of the store, which strangely seemed to have been built continually downward, below ground level. From that vantage point, I also noticed that down below the window there was a separate conveyor belt that you could get on in order to be taken down there.
So I got the hell on it.
Down below was a large, mostly empty atrium of sorts, with a few patrons passing through it, mainly crossing from doors and hallways at opposite ends of the room. I turned away from the conveyor belt and followed a rather dark corridor leading back from where the upper-level window had been.
The next thing I remember was being in my aunt ’s living room, though a very strange version of it. She’s the one that used to babysit me and make me Delicate Cookies when I was a kid living in Newfoundland; still one of the best recipes in my collection. I don’t get the sense that she looked like herself in the dream, but I knew instinctively that it was her. I was with at least one other person — my brother, maybe, but I can’t remember who it was. In her house the living room, dining room, and kitchen are all on the same level, with a door separating the living room from the two other spaces. In the dream version of her house, the living room and darkened dining room were on the bottom level, and then walking up a small set of stairs took you to a small, purposeless landing, where you could take another small set of stairs to reach the kitchen at the top. It was all open plan.
In reality, she is still sound of mind and reasonably healthy, physically, but in the dream, she seemed confused and kept putting things in unusual places. At one point, she startled when I came near her and explained that she’d actually been sleepwalking the whole time. I felt unnerved. The house was very dark, all the curtains drawn; the only light that had been on had been the one above the stove. She led me and whoever I was with away from the kitchen, over toward a set of double doors. Beyond them, it was broad daylight, and other relatives were sitting on the patio chatting and laughing as if nothing had been amiss.
I sat and stayed for a while, but then suddenly I was walking out into another large atrium, brightly-lit and far more cavernous than the one at Winners had been. I recognized this place; much like the living room abyss, this was a location I had dreamt of more than once in my childhood.
It was the McDonald’s corporate headquarters, it was the 90s again, and a gaggle of families were there with their children, sitting at the heavy, restaurant-style tables scattered throughout the atrium, eating cake. Some sort of celebration was underway, but we had likely arrived just as it was winding down.
My parents led me and my brother through that carpeted main hall without stopping for cake.
We were little kids again. Six and three.
One section of that main hall had been walled off in glass or plastic barriers and filled with child-size tables and chairs so that kids could mingle freely on the inside while their parents watched on the outside.
For some reason this detail stuck out in my mind: one kid in a dress, sitting on a chair, shoes just barely touching the carpeted floor, eating cake.
I don’t know what my parents were looking for, but it clearly wasn’t cake.
They led us all the way over to the other side of the atrium, where barely anyone had chosen to sit, and then into a corridor. It was carpeted too, and felt both too-clean and still-grimy, the way old airports tend to when they don’t get the foot traffic they used to. It was too quiet back there, and I started to feel uncomfortable.
Then my little brother and I were alone.
I don’t know why, just that we were.
So we had to be brave — I had to be brave.
I took my brother’s hand and started to walk back through the corridor we were in, though I had no idea where we were going, or how to find our parents again. I tried not to let my fear show. A few people passed us, but we weren’t to talk to strangers, and curiously, they paid us no mind. Finally, after wandering through several corridors without success, we came upon a glass door that led into a unlit room. My little brother opened it cautiously, and together we stepped just inside, the both of us holding the door ajar. The light from the corridor gave us some sense of what was in there. To our left were pools of water, the water running and overflowing gently into each one. I didn’t like being in the dark, but there was something strangely calming about the dark pools of water, like they were the beginnings of an aquatic garden.
My little brother tightened his grip on my hand, and I looked over at him quizzically.
Which is when my eyes caught on the sight that had alarmed him.
Eyes.
Countless eyes flashing back at us from the other side of the room, the humanoid figures that belonged to them shrouded in shadow.
A cry caught in my throat, and holding even more firmly to my little brother’s hand, I pulled him back from the room into the hallway, the glass door shutting behind us as we broke into a run, going back the way we had come.
Or at least I assumed we were heading back the way we had come.
We were utterly lost, fear sharpening our reflexes and making our panicked minds go fuzzy.
At last, we ran into another room, this one lit from above by pot lights and filled with rows of large, oval tables, some sections of the room fenced off with plain chain-link panels. But there they were: our parents.
Sitting at one of the tables and eating some sort of meal — though not cake.
The rest of the room was conspicuously empty, and my hackles rose.
My parents seemed rather relaxed and unbothered, and somehow I knew that their food had been laced with a drug of some kind.
We needed to leave, all four of us, as quickly as possible.
Something told me that the eyes that had stared back at us from the depths of that darkened water-garden had been adults like our parents at some point, having been whisked away to be experimented upon after having ingested the tainted food. I kept urging our parents to follow us and leave, but they didn’t have any real sense of urgency. They were humouring me.
I kept hold of my little brother’s hand, and we led the way, but the hallway was darker coming back out of the room than it had been going in, and we slipped off into a side passage where I hoped we could avoid notice so that our parents wouldn’t be captured. This new corridor’s walls were made of curving glass, and utterly dark; I thought there might be some sort of liquid on the other side of them, but I couldn’t be certain. The floor was a wooden boardwalk suspended in water and lit dimly from below. Water sloshed up over the wood, the walkway bobbing and swaying, as we made our way across.
My brother and I were so busy looking at our feet to make sure we were walking on the planks of wood and not getting our little feet caught in the watery spaces between them, that we didn’t notice the researcher’s approach until it was too late.
From the depths of the snaking, eerily-lit corridor, a figure wearing a full diving outfit, complete with glass and metal bubble helmet came lunging toward us, and —
I woke up.
I woke up to Scout giving me a quizzical look from the end of the bed, because I’d just emerged from a frankendream and probably seemed rather flustered and sweaty. I’m not actually certain when I fell asleep, but given that the dream-turned-nightmare went four levels deep, I have to assume I was under the influence of the stranger parts of my subconscious for a good hour or two.
Not long after that, I made myself presentable, gave Scout and early supper, and headed out to my brother’s house for a family dinner.
A dinner that featured a roast expertly-prepared by my brother’s girlfriend, sweet corn shucked by my brother and I (inexpertly, according to our very amused and somewhat exasperated father), and fried cod tongues, a belated birthday present for our mother, whose favourite food is exactly that.
As soon as I got in the door, though, I was greeted by two cardboard boxes: one filled with some LPs from my mom’s twenties, and one filled with tons of not-for-sale singles from her days as a radio DJ and morning show host that she’d been allowed to take home from work and keep. My father didn’t have any records, because instead of those, he’d been collecting 8-tracks and cassettes, all of which he’s long had converted to mp3 files. He seemed particularly delighted when we unearthed a single by The Alan Parsons Project (Side A: Eye In the Sky / Side B: Gemini), one of several bands, apparently, whose works he’d collected almost entirely on cassette.
I felt a little indignant about the fact that my parents used to listen to those sorts of bands but would always just put on soft rock radio stations at home instead of playing cassettes/records of albums that they personally collected. What gives?! Which is not to say that I didn’t enjoy the music on those stations. I just. Could have had more exposure to rock and albums made to be listened to as whole works of art much earlier — rather than simply listening to individual songs in isolation the way I did for most of my childhood.
The important thing, I suppose, is that I’m trying to work through a backlog of cool sonic journeys now, as an adult. And enjoying all the new ones that are coming out currently.
ALICE NINE.‘s as-yet-unnamed album will be one such epic sonic journey, I’m quite sure, especially given how cool the lead track Funeralis, and the passion that Saga currently seems to be pouring into the recording of said album, if the following tweet is anything to go by:
Half of the album has bass solos, I’m playing acoustic guitar the whole way through on I dunno how many songs, And I’m singing the chorus, rapping, growling, chanting, and doing backup vocals, so 😇 What’s my part now? 😇
I love Saga deeply. Reading that update made me so very happy. Let your passion and musical talent be unleashed even more! My ears, my mind, my heart, and my imagination are in for such a treat on release day! 楽しみだよ！♥
Ahem. Back to discussing the family dinner.
When my mom noticed the gold pearl ring on my finger, while we were chatting between supper and dessert, she expressed how pleased she was that I still wore it, because she was the one that gave it to me when I was twelve (it used to be hers), but then my father chimed in to explain something about it that I hadn’t known. Apparently it had originally housed a ruby (mom’s birthstone), but the ruby had fallen out long ago. When they’d been living in San Diego as newlyweds, they’d repaired it by having a pearl set in the ring instead. My mom insisted that the pearl had been chosen from a clam “at a Japanese garden”, while my father had insisted that the pearl had been bought “at Sea World”; maybe they were somehow referring to the same place. My little heirloom just got more mysterious.
After dessert (an incredibly rich wild blueberry custard pie that my brother’s girlfriend had picked up from the farmer’s market), me and my brother’s girlfriend exchanged an inordinate number of cat photos (…okay, I admit, it was mostly me showing her a ridiculous number of Scout photos), as well as some recommendations. She advised me to listen to Lizzo’s newest album Special (I did so while doing dishes this morning and it elevated the entire experience into something playful and joy-filled), while I advised her to listen to Beyoncé’s RENAISSANCE in full because, where Lemonade was an album imbued with a confidence born out of anger and hurt, RENAISSANCE is an album filled with confidence couched in ease and trust — both powerful for different reasons. I also recommended she listen to the latest Billy Talent, Crisis of Faith (a rallying cry for social justice and compassion wrapped up in a truly hard-hitting, excellent sound), and to my brother, I recommended OFF-TRACK, Steve Neville‘s first solo album, created and recorded while he was undergoing cancer treatment, and you can hear all the humanity and raw emotion of that experience in the sound on the record. His sister Jacquie Neville and former bandmate Liam Jaeger participated in the creation of the album as well.
As an aside, the Neville siblings and Liam Jaeger were the founding members of The Balconies, one of my favourite bands, which happens to have been formed in my hometown of Ottawa, Ontario. I never actually attended a show when Steve was part of the band (he left shortly before I managed to see them live), but I did attend the very last concert they played for their 10th Anniversary on February 3, 2018. It was stellar. They also released a final album at that point, “Show You“, that boasted recordings from 2012 — compared to their last two albums, Fast Motions and Rhonda, the sound on Show You was a lot more ‘garage’, and it featured earlier arrangements of songs that had come out on later albums. It was a great surprise release at the time, is what I’m saying, and I recommend it.
Just after dessert, my father made a big announcement: he’s going to be interviewed for an internet security podcast this week (he’s a big name in the white hat/security world). As someone who listens to a lot of podcasts during the workweek especially, I thought that was pretty cool and I’m looking forward to listening to the episode, even if a lot of the shop talk goes over my head.
If you’re curious, some of the podcasts I listen to regularly are ones like RISK! (since like 2014 or 2015 — incredible cross-section of true stories that are moving, hilarious, filthy, shocking, and thought-provoking), Getting Curious with JVN, Writers Ink, The Secret Room, What Was That Like, The Dark Paranormal, Financial Feminist, Hiroto’s Voicy, Kei’s SYNERGY twitcast, and lately, the back-catalogue of Supercontext, which I can already tell is going to become a bit of an obsession for me. I’m currently listening to a detailed examination of David Bowie’s Blackstar album, and then I’m on to an absolute treat… an in-depth analysis of one of my very favourite comics: volume one of the incomparable space opera, Saga (art by Fiona Staples, story by Brian K. Vaughn).
And no, it’s not a favourite just because it shares a name with Saga (though I love that link). It definitely delivers on the “space opera” front, has a diverse cast of characters (including plenty of queer ones), incredible art and witty writing, is steamy and filthy in all the right ways as well as being perfectly fluffy and romantic when the mood calls for it, will move you to tears, and then later make you laugh with its often dry and irreverent sense of humour.
It’s a favourite because the comic series itself, both visually and narratively, is stellar.
And I was today-years-old when I realized that they actually started releasing new issues of Saga again this January after a long hiatus; their 10th volume is going to be published this October, so I might wait to buy that and then start buying single issues after that. Yet another thing to get very excited about.
Okay, I’ll stop waxing lyrical about Saga2. （´・ω・｀）
It’s a long weekend, so I get to stay home and do more creating tomorrow. Back to writing and editing TE9…
According to a few commenters and a translator in another piece of coverage from another network, this singer wasn’t singing O Canada, but rather a very old Cree song that could be put to the melody of the national anthem.
In spite of the Catholic church and the Canadian government’s efforts to tear apart indigenous families with the goal of extinguishing the many indigenous languages and cultures nationwide, she sings. They failed. She will not be silenced, she rejects the shame these institutions tried to force on her and on thousands of other children, so many of whom did not survive the ordeal.
I highly recommend listening to the following two podcasts, both of which are investigations into the atrocities carried out in two different residential schools in two different provinces in Canada. Each podcast centers the stories of those who survived, in the survivors’ own voices. They both also highlight the effects of intergenerational trauma, as well as how the indigenous communities draw upon, protect, and revive their own cultures in order to continue to heal.
As a primer into how the Canadian government’s attempt at carrying out this cultural genocide culminated in the establishment of these long-running residential schools, I recommend this quick but incredibly informative read:
At the very least, we need to understand what happened, to bear witness both to the truth of the horrific abuse that occurred, along with the true beauty and complexity of the indigenous languages and cultures that have survived and now flourish despite colonial attempts to quash them.
The weight of shame and silence is not for survivors to bear.
The Cree singer gave voice to so many.
You don’t need to understand a word of Cree to understand the spirit of her message.
